W Blix

Life lessons part XXXIII by W Blix

Better put your shades on, honey. We’re bringing the heat!

660. Tromsø is just awful.

659. If you don’t read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.

658. Da game is to be sold, not to be told.

657. Don’t follow your dreams. Just ask where they’re goin’, and hook up with them later.

656. It is fun to have fun, but you have to know how.

655. Make fire or get fired.

654. Gotta keep your hair, heels, and standards high!

653. If We don’t stand up for others when they’re persecuted, We lose the right to complain when it’s done to Us.

652. You congratulate the groom. You offer the bride best wishes.

651. It is better to piss in the sink, than to sink in the piss.

650. Hardships don’t wait until you’re strong and ready.

649. Cool guys don’t look at explosions.

648. Men argue. Nature acts.

647. Between the mighty and the modest, truth is the great leveler.

646. It’s hard being pretty and white.

645. Act like you belong.

644. You’re doomed if you don’t have a killer catchphrase.

643. Live to win!

642. The answer to “Shall We dance?” is always “Yes!”

641. The Ukraine is strong!

Hugs and kisses.

Jubilations by W Blix

Happy birthday to His Majesty King Harald!

King and Country!

Life lessons part XXXII by W Blix

Come on, and bring your jukebox money.

640. To be in Tromsø is to hate it.

639. Intelligent comedy is limited by it’s audience.

638. To be a true player, you haffi know how fi play.

637. It’s hard to be humble. When you’re perfect in every way.

636. If you want people to like you, just go along with what they say and have fun.

635. Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill.

634. A woman’s hair is her crowning glory.

633. Communist gonna communist.

632. The power of love is a curious thing. Make a one man weep, make another man sing.

631. A business is like an ocean. You just got to surf it.

630. Strength and readiness doesn’t assure victory, it assures confidence.

629. Take your passion, and make it happen.

628. Tampa is the Florida of Florida.

627. It’s not enough to say ‘I don’t give a shit’ you have to fucking show it!

626. Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.

625. It’s five O’clock somewhere.

624. Stupid risks are what make life worth living.

623. To always win, you always need to be hungry!

622. Dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free

621. YOU BETTER GET YOUR HEAD AND YOUR ASS WIRED TOGETHER!!

signed sealed delivered

Life lessons part XXXI by W Blix

Sing it, sister!

620. Sometimes even a picnic’s no picnic.

619. Often times in life there are problems, and just as often there are solutions. Booyaka!

618. If you show up with Ring Dings and Pepsi, you become the biggest hit of the party.

617. Love is spice with many tastes. A dizzying array of textures… and moments.

616. When you ask someone about their relationship and they touch their face, you know it’s not going too well.

615. Get it on with your bad self!

614. It’s hard enough to meet a woman you dislike, much less like.

613. The most unattractive world leader of all time is Brezhnev.

612. If it wasn’t for the toilet, there would be no books.

611. You don’t sell the steak, you sell the sizzle!

610. Talk the talk and walk the walk.

609. It’s tough keeping your feet dry when you’re strolling through a dewy meadow.

608. Men can sit through the most boring movie if there’s even the slightest possibility that a woman will take her top off.

607. Fight dirty.

606. Dress based on mood.

605. Thou who cureth, can maketh ill.

604. The first thing you’re gonna need is a driver.

603. We’re living in a society!

602. You don’t wanna meet the people that are in the market for a used van.

601. You gotta intimidate when you’re on the mound.

Happy, Pappy?

Glory waits for no man part II: This time it’s personal by W Blix

Bodø/Glimt has won the Elite Series for the second time in their 105 year history. This, of course, is the greatest achievement in the history of organized sports. Even greater than last year!

We have to admit We were confident this would happen.

The football the boys have produced all season has been very good.

Hopefully they’ll perform even better next season.

An amazing time for all Glimt fans!

Victorious hugs and kisses.

Life lessons part XXX: Sweet Sixteen Edition by W Blix

You’re in the Blix Zone!

600. Have a triple X old time!

599. Surf the net. There’s a lot of information there.

598. Express yourself

597. Send them to charm school.

596. Learn as little as you can. ‘Cause when you know things, people ask you to do things. And then, everyone starts coming to you with their problems.

595. You gotta roll with the punches to get to what’s real.

594. Make sure you have on a smashing blouse.

593. The epitome of white privilege is the luxury of believing that real communism has never been tried.

592. They can’t smell tequila on your breath on a video conference call.

591. The boy with the cold hard cash is always mister right.

590. There are two things we should always be 1. strong and 2. ready. When you are strong, you are always ready and when you are ready you usually realize that you are strong. Waiting for perfection is not an answer, one cannot say “I will be ready when I am perfect” because then you will never be ready, rather one must say “I am strong and I am ready just like this right now, how and who I am.

589. Find him fast. Kill him slow.

588. Anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac.

587. If you are going to sin, sin against Odin, not the bureaucracy. Odin will forgive you but the bureaucracy won’t.

586. If you interrupt a wedding, the speech better be good.

585. He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life.

584. Book a one-way ticket to flavortown!

583. It doesn’t matter how many times you have failed to win it. The only thing that matters is winning it!

582. Some dance to remember, some dance to forget.

581. Kick some ass, get the girl, and try to look dope while you do it.

We live for this shit.

Life lessons part XXIX by W Blix
Nineteen in the clip and one in the hole. W Blix is about to make some bodies turn cold…

580. Let your hatred Tromsø for fuel you.

579. It’s easier to fool someone than it is to convince them they’ve been fooled.

578. Real Gs move in silence like lasagna.

577. If you keep screaming your name, it forces the assailant to acknowledge you as a human.

576. Nothing good ever happens on a playground near the Vatican.

575. No guts, no glory!

574. Assert your dominance by putting a few decorative pillows in your husband’s truck.

573. Socialism, communism, and fascism are the political manifestations of unachievable ideals, carried to genocidal extremes.

572. When the thought of someone’s decapitated head upsets you, that is love.

571. A key component to enjoying free time is money.

570. Put the pussy on the chainwax!

569. If one avoids the hard sciences, college is pretty easy.

568. You can’t shampoo away sin.

567. America needs another big lake.

566. Live large.

565. LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!

564. Throwing acid is wrong, in some people’s eyes.

563. It is deeply satisfying to win a prize in front of a lot of people.

562. You gotta funk it up until it knocks you down. And when you’ve funked enough, make sure you pass it around.

561. Roll the dice. Feel the fear in your enemy’s eyes.
Hugs and kisses.

Life lessons part XXVIII by W Blix

We’ve got a blind date with Destiny… and it looks like she’s ordered the lobster.

560. Tromsø is trash.
559. It’s time to take out the trash.
558. When it’s sink or swim, you got to think to win.
557. No matter where you are going, you have to change planes in Atlanta.
556. The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.
555. Always identify yourself at the beginning of all phone calls.
554. The worst decisions make the best stories.
553. The world would not be in such a snarl, had Marx been Groucho instead of Karl.
552. Leftovers are for quitters.
551. We are all self made, but only the rich will admit it.
550. Sing the songs that remind you of the good times. Sing the songs that remind you of the best times.
549. If you’ve seen the movie 300 more than once you’re gay.
548. Turn on, tune in, drop out.
547. Bureaucracy will destroy western civilization.
546. If you’re protesting against racism, you’re going to upset some racists.
545. Keep the talent happy!
544. If you make a grand gesture, you can get any girl you want.
543. To thrive in life you need three bones. A wish bone, a back bone, and a funny bone.
542. Dance until you stink.
541. Dare mighty things.

There’s a lot goin’ on

Royal by W Blix

Wishing Our dear King a very happy birthday!

King and Country!

Life lessons part XXVII by W Blix

This here’s a jam for all the fellas…

540. Tromsø should be destroyed.
539. So much of writing is just figuring out chapter titles.
538. Ain’t no half steppin
537. Send in the clowns.
536. The main ingredient is sincerity. And once you learn to fake that? Baby, you’ve got it made.
535. Plebs are needed!
534. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
533. There is nothing in socialism that a little age or a little money will not cure.
532. You cannot be wise and young.
531. Money can’t buy happiness. It IS happiness.
530. Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength and readiness to endure a difficult one.
529. True discipline come from within.
528. A man’s got to have a code.
527. It’s not a good song if it doesn’t have a good video.
526. Don’t sit in silence. Don’t live with fear.
525. Drinking is the only way to get through a marriage.
524. Dinner time. The perfect break between work and drunk.
523. Life is a game, you can’t afford to lose.
522. You gotta learn to dance before you learn to crawl
521. Command and conquer!

Hugs and kisses.